The Rambles of Neil Monnery

Another pointless voice in the vast ocean that is the interweb

Archive for the ‘tv’ tag

On being a liberal and not rejoicing at Jeremy Clarkson’s suspension…

with 4 comments

Jeremy Clarkson is a sacking away from becoming the most valuable free agent in the history of UK television. Should the BBC bite the bullet and part ways with one of the three presenters of Top Gear then they will have struck a decisive blow for the majority of people that I follow on twitter. The outpouring of sheer delight has been overwhelming. I’m pretty sure the Pupil Premium didn’t get as much praise as Jeremy Clarkson’s suspension and that is because the biggest problem with liberals is that anything they don’t like, they believe that other people should not like as well. It is the most frustrating thing I’ve found with a lot of (predominately young) liberals. They are right. What they like is right. Anything else is wrong.

We don’t know the full story behind Jeremy’s suspension but we do know the BBC are in a very tight spot. They have a presenter who they can sack and move on from pretty easily. The problem is that all the talent that make one of their most popular shows worldwide will in all likelihood go with him.

My timeline is full of suggestions for who the BBC could use to replace Jeremy Clarkson but they have failed to grasp that should he leave, in all likelihood Richard Hammond and James May follow him out of the door. Andy Wilman most certainly would. This means that Top Gear would essentially cease to exist in its current form and I’ll tell you this, so many liberals would rejoice at this because it would mean more money for Doctor Who (well actually it wouldn’t as Top Gear earns the BBC an inordinate amount of money but still, facts…)

We aren’t that used to TV suspensions over here but I’m used to it as I watch a lot of American TV and ESPN dish out suspensions all the time to on screen talent, sometimes with no rhyme or reason. When a journalist (Keith Law) called out a pundit (Curt Schilling) on twitter for saying that creationism should be the only thing taught in school then yes, the journalist got suspended. When a presenter (Tony Kornheiser) mocked what a colleague was wearing on his radio show, then he got suspended.

Every time Bill Simmons makes a run at Roger Goodell (which happens all the time) then he gets suspended. Stephen A. Smith got suspended for his comments on domestic abuse and Keith Olbermann got suspended just a week or so ago for his attack on Penn State students for raising money for cancer research (yes this actually happened – a presenter attacked a school for raising money for cancer research). So on-air talent suspensions is nothing new. People go away for a while and come back. It is no big deal.

When it comes to Top Gear and the BBC though, the BBC have backed themselves into a corner. They desperately don’t want to sack Jeremy Clarkson. They know that his worth to the corporation is probably more than any single other individual they have. Should they get rid of him then they are walking away from the best part of £150million a year in profits. So that is a significant chunk of change. Yet if he was on his ‘final warning’ and he has indeed punched a producer then they have no choice. They have to be seen to do the right thing and watch Clarkson go to a rival network, create a similar show and make a tonne of money whilst they watch their biggest worldwide asset wither.

Zoe Williams in the Guardian has written an interesting piece on the subject. She says herself that she, ‘stayed up late last night trolling Jeremy Clarkson’ in writing the piece, like Jeremy Clarkson really cares about what someone who clearly doesn’t watch the show thinks about him but still. The long and short of it is basically she thinks Top Gear should be focused on car reviews and not light entertainment.

She obviously doesn’t remember why Top Gear disappeared from our screens in the first place or why nobody watches Fifth Gear but her piece is full of factual errors and shows that it is just an attack on someone she doesn’t like because she can. Living the dream. For example she attacks the show for being stuck in the past and not reviewing cars of the future, saying, ‘The coolest car in the world right now is the BMW i8, a part electric, part petrol dreamscape of silent majesty.’ She obviously didn’t watch Jeremy reviewing it and giving it the big thumbs up this season.

This though is typical. People will attack the show because they want it to be something different and they want different presenters because they think their version of Top Gear would be better. The problem with this point of view is that everyone’s tastes are different. I saw a well-known member of the liberal twitterati (basically those liberals who do considering themselves better than everyone else – heck there are lots out there) yesterday on twitter going on about how Sky didn’t understand her because they spent money on football. Well I’d argue that Sky aren’t catering their whole business plan to her (I mean how self-centred would you have to be to think that?) but also has she not noticed that Sky’s whole existence and business model is based around football? I mean it isn’t exactly a secret… Another member of this ilk tweeted about how he’d not seen anyone on his TL do anything but rejoice at Clarkson’s suspension and that it showed the quality of person that he followed. I mean really…

Sometimes people like things that you don’t, instead of changing that thing to suit you, maybe you should look elsewhere to find something that you like. I don’t like many TV shows but I don’t think, ‘well if they changed this, this and this about a show then I’d like it and if I like it then everyone else should.’ Liking Top Gear is something you whisper in hushed tones around some people. It isn’t clever enough and people who enjoy it are simply not smart enough to know any better. If they ran Top Gear it would be more informative and it will appeal to those people, the problem is the ratings would plummet and no-one would buy it overseas. It is a similar scenario to those people thinking The Sun should base its business model around those people who don’t (and would never) buy The Sun. Yeah, like that makes any sense…

I hope Jeremy Clarkson survives because I enjoy Top Gear. If he goes though he probably can’t complain should the rumours be correct. The thing is though he will be fine, he’ll get whatever he wants from ITV or Sky and all the Top Gear talent would follow him. He won’t disappear from our screens so victory would be hollow for those rejoicing in his demise. This isn’t Ron Atkinson folks, he won’t become persona non grata in the broadcast industry, the truth is it would be quite the opposite, he would be the biggest free agent to ever hit the marketplace and broadcasters would be crushing into other broadcasters’ lorries full of cash ready to back up and dump it on his front lawn. Jeremy Clarkson may survive at Top Gear, he may not but whatever happens he’ll certainly survive on TV and if he goes to a commercial station then he’ll arguably be a lot better off.

Top Gear isn’t popular because its about cars, its popular because of the three presenters and the back stage team who put together a show that has morphed into something far bigger than anyone could have predicted a decade or so ago. Still if he goes the outpouring of joy will be quite something and it’ll be chalked up as one for the good guys whereas in reality he’ll be relatively unscarred no matter how it plays out.

I hope you enjoyed this blog post. Please leave any comments or contact me directly via the E-Mail Me link on the Right Hand Nav. You can stay in touch with the blog following me on Twitter or by liking the blog on Facebook. Please share this content via the Social Media links below if you think anyone else would enjoy reading.

  • Share on Tumblr

Written by neilmonnery

March 11th, 2015 at 11:48 am

Posted in Media

Tagged with

On being a romantic at heart – a rare Take Me Out extra on Looci & Nick…

without comments

Every year I write a blog about the women of Take Me Out. It is a bit of fun that I do because it allows me to write a bit differently from my usual style. I like the show as it is a bit of Saturday night cheese.

Tonight whilst watching I saw Jonathan get a blackout. All thirty women turned off their light and he got no date. There was nothing wrong with him at all. He seemed like a nice guy, not unattractive, but yet all the women decided that didn’t want him. I planned on writing about that as people often ask me why I don’t apply to go on the show because I do the blog etc. and I always say the same thing – there is literally no way that I’d get a date because I’m not an attractive man, my VT introducing me would be, ‘well I’m a bit of boring sod who does naff all with his life but is content with things’ and yeah, couple that with this face *points to his face* oh and not to forget my lack of style, I’d do well to get through two rounds let alone three.

Still then things changed when the next guy came down the lift. Seemed like a nice chap, seemed like a regular sort, loved the fact he was just in his regular clothes and was just being who he was. So then we go through the VT and then Paddy speaks to one of the girls who has kept her light on and she is his ex. Boom. She kept her light on because he was and I quote ‘beautiful inside and out’ – she had dumped him a while ago and as we’d find out he was her last serious relationship. This was genuinely emotional. You could tell there was something still in the air between them. All the other girls bowed out gracefully to let Looci get a date with her ex apart from one girl, Elisha. I thought that was poor form. I said so on twitter. Weirdly she favourited that tweet.

So the guy (Nick) had the choice between his ex and another girl. There was zero doubt in anyone’s mind that he was going to pick Looci and indeed he did and they kissed and I jumped up and fist pumped in joy and I’m not going to lie, I welled up a little bit. These are two people I don’t know from Adam and I never will and yet I was rooting so hard for them to get together. You don’t go on a show like this and keep your light on if you see your ex if you don’t still have serious feelings for them.

If its an ex who is in the past you turn off your light, say you did but say he’s a great guy and anyone would lucky to go on a date with him and move on. She kept her light on. There was a serious chance of romance. Paddy even clearly welled up as he visibly wiped his eyes after they embraced (and seeing Claire – who is fast becoming a favourite – when I say fast – I mean she’s amazing – jumping up and down in sheer delight was just so so cool). It is just a TV show but it brought happiness into two people’s lives. Who knows if they got back together – I hope so that is for sure.

I turned over to watch on +1 just to watch it again and whilst we never saw who his ‘love at first light was’ – if you watch closely and see how to writes on Paddy’s pad, it does very much look as though he writes ‘Looci’ so yes. Just brilliant. Was genuinely happy. A friend said to me that I was a romantic at heart and that might be true (and a surprise to many) but I love happy endings. Like they make me happy that other people can be happy in this world full of horror that we all live in.

I also want to write a brief comment here on how to get a Valentine’s Day card from Looci. She is doing this to raise money for Yorkshire Cat Rescue. All she wants is for a donation of at least £5 within the UK and at least £10 internationally and she’ll send you a personalised Valentine’s Day card. It is for a good cause and you get to receive a Valentine’s Day card from a bloody gorgeous woman. In addition, she will have a half hour Skype date with whoever donates the most by the end of Valentine’s day, and she’ll send you an actual gift.

So to do this then please donate via this link and then send a screenshot of your donation to her e-mail address address along with your address and she’ll get this done for you. For this project her e-mail address is

It is all in a good cause so go on folks, donate to Yorkshire Cat Rescue, the more the merrier and you never know, you could have a Skype date with someone who may or may not have made you well up this evening (if you had a heart then you’ll have welled up). I hope she raises lots of money. As a cat person who has always said he wants a ginger kitten when I finally settle down and buy somewhere, cat rescue is in my eyes an extremely worthy charity to give a few notes too.

I hope you enjoyed this blog post. Please leave any comments or contact me directly via the E-Mail Me link on the Right Hand Nav. You can stay in touch with the blog following me on Twitter or by liking the blog on Facebook. Please share this content via the Social Media links below if you think anyone else would enjoy reading.

  • Share on Tumblr

Written by neilmonnery

February 7th, 2015 at 10:34 pm

Posted in Media

Tagged with ,

Take Me Out Girls 2015 – Season Seven

with 33 comments

To watch Becky’s first cooking video of Boom Bangers & Wholegrain Mustard then click here.

So here I am once more. I have just collated all the profiles and photos for the flirty thirty as the seventh season of Take Me Out gets under way on Saturday night.

Like last year, I’ve got together the photos Fremantle Media have sent out along with the details and some random facts about the girls as sent out as part of the press pack. It is intended to be a light-hearted and whimsy look at the people that will be lighting up our screens for the next few weeks.

This year Laura Jackson will be joining Mark Wright as host of The Gossip and of course Paddy McGuinness is the master of ceremonies for the main event as per usual. The show has been responsible for three engagements, two weddings and one baby already and another is due in March, so it isn’t just entertainment, it has changed lives too. If I recall correctly Blind Date had two weddings in its entire run so TMO isn’t doing too bad for itself!

On communicating with the girls, in general most of them over the past few series have been fine with follows/tweets but prefer not to be contacted via Facebook. Most of them will have twitter accounts so feel free to search for them and tweet them, however I’d recommend not trying to get in touch via other social media platforms as in general they prefer them to be kept more private.

Adding people to Facebook when you don’t really know them can come across as a little bit weird and creepy, just trust me on that, I have been there and done it and yeah, not good. It can easily lead to awkwardness and regret and stuff so honestly folks, just don’t do it. I’m pretty laid back on this front but other people, less so and if I was a girl and on a show like Take Me Out, I suspect I’d be pretty weirded out lots of random guys I didn’t know adding me to Facebook so think folks, think.

Anyway, no-one cares about the preamble. You are here for photos and details. They are all provided below. You can click on the photos for a larger version. I hope you enjoy the light-hearted take on things and enjoy the show. I wrote it all up and WordPress decided to lose over two thirds of my text so I had to re-write most of it, I hope it is as interesting second time around because I was writing it whilst swearing at WordPress a lot.

So what time is it…?

Peanut Butter Jelly Time, Peanut Butter Jelly Time…

No wait, that’s not it.

What time is it?

It’s Chico time.

No, No, No. That isn’t it either.

Paddy, what time is it?

It’s time to bring on the girls…


Flirty Thirty



Age: 19
Job: Administration Support Assistant
Location: Cardiff
Length of being single before Take Me Out: Seven Months
Random Fact: Her nickname is ‘Abs Cabs’ as she keeps dating guys who don’t drive and she has to drive them around. As an aside here, I don’t drive but don’t ever feel the need to get driven around. Yes I get the odd lift here n there but in general I just use the choo choo and walk everywhere I need to go. People should use public transport and walk more, they shouldn’t rely on people driving them around. Anyway…back to our regularly scheduled programming…
Reason why I think she’s great: She goes to a spin class and annoys others by her constant talking and cheering herself on. I’m sorry but I love the mental image I have of people cheering themselves on whilst working out. It is quite lovely.
Reason why she wouldn’t think I was: She is turned off by those who wear 1980s sneakers and don’t drive. What is the verdict on Nike Air Max 95s?



Age: 29
Job: Transport & Logistics Co-Ordinator
Location: Bolton
Length of being single before Take Me Out: Eighteen Months
Random Fact: She flushes public loos with her feet to avoid getting germs on her hands. Look I know public loos can be pretty grim at times but that seems like a lot of effort, doesn’t it?
Reason why I think she’s great: She has a soft spot for geeks. More people should. Am I clever enough to be classed as a geek? Answers on a postcard…
Reason why she wouldn’t think I was: Her ideal man is a racing driver, how does she feel about a guy who doesn’t even drive…? Oh.



Age: 27
Job: Vintage Dress Maker
Location: Staffordshire
Length of being single before Take Me Out: Four Months
Random Fact: She knows all the words to most of the big 90s rap songs. I’d sing-song against her with Coolio’s Gangsta’s Paradise.
Reason why I think she’s great: Have a look at the dress in her photo that has been sent out. I mean come on, who wouldn’t instantly fall in love with someone who was wearing a dress that was a comic? Seriously awesome.
Reason why she wouldn’t think I was: Her ideal man runs his own business, well technically I do so I’m in the game folks, I’m in the freaking game *starts to hyperventilate* but wait, there is more, and this ideal guy also drives a Lamborghini. Bugger.



Age: 34
Job: Nail Technician Student
Location: Blackpool
Length of being single before Take Me Out: Two Years
Random Fact: Her nickname is foghorn as she is loud and chatty
Reason why I think she’s great: She loves Am Dram. More people should enjoy the arts.
Reason why she wouldn’t think I was: Her ideal first date would be something energetic and fun-packed like rock climbing. My idea of energetic is rolling over in bed to the cold side (ok that might be slightly facetious but still…)

Becky Take Me Out 2015


Age: 28
Job: Catering Student
Location: Sheffield
Length of being single before Take Me Out: One Year
Random Fact: She has a green belt in Karate.
Reason why I think she’s great: Three of the six notes sent out by the production company about Becky are about her love for food. I mean that is enough to like someone isn’t it, her obvious love of food? As an aside here, when I first scanned the press pack, I looked at her and I have seen her before somewhere, I have no idea where but the face rings a bell, weird.
Reason why she wouldn’t think I was: She once ended up in A&E with a sprained ankle whilst doing a runner from a boring date. I can’t imagine what she’d do to herself in her desperation to get away from me on a date, I fear she’d do a lot more damage than that.



Age: 26
Job: Personal Trainer
Location: Stevenage
Length of being single before Take Me Out: One Year
Random Fact: She was once a club 18-30 rep.
Reason why I think she’s great: She has been known to sack her clients who aren’t putting in the effort with regards to their personal training. I like this hardball attitude. I know she could whip me into shape (and not in the good way I thought about when I typed that sentence…)
Reason why she wouldn’t think I was: Because of that previous sentence. Oh and her ideal man should be manly and dressed well amongst other characteristics and I’m afraid they are two things that I am not.



Age: 23
Job: Fairy/Murder Mystery Role Player
Location: Manchester
Length of being single before Take Me Out: Eight Months
Random Fact: Her biggest fear is the tube and the idea of getting trapped in the doors.
Reason why I think she’s great: He nickname is ‘Two Teas Claire’ because she loves food so much that she used to have two teas, one at 4PM and one at 8PM. I could be fully on board with this Claire. I really could.
Reason why she wouldn’t think I was: She is looking for an older man, she’s 23, I’m 31…we are in play here folks, we are in play, *high fives the non existent crowd of people behind me* but wait, there is more, preferably a silver fox, ok I’ll just go to the mirror and check…bugger. What if I get silver hair glitter, will that do…?



Age: 23
Job: City Worker
Location: London Town
Length of being single before Take Me Out: One Year
Random Fact: She once thought the Lake District was in Essex *shakes head in despair*
Reason why I think she’s great: Her biggest passion is chocolate. Someone who knows where it is at!
Reason why she wouldn’t think I was: Her celebrity crush is Joey Essex. All Joey Essex and I share is our mix of chromosomes. She also wants a guy who can street dance well…



Age: 23
Job: Account Manager for a Bank
Location: Cheshire
Length of being single before Take Me Out: Four Months
Random Fact: She is obsessed by Legally Blonde and tries to model for life on the lead Elle Woods.
Reason why I think she’s great: She has a first class degree. Brains are sexy folks. Brains are fecking sexy.
Reason why she wouldn’t think I was: Her ideal man would be a traditional guy, nice teeth, good clean-cut face and a well-fitting suit. O for 4 folks. I don’t even own a suit, let alone a well-fitting one. Also, me? Traditional? Yeah right…



Age: 26
Job: Events Recruitment Agent
Location: London Town
Length of being single before Take Me Out: Seven Months
Random Fact: She was crowned Miss Globe England in 2013
Reason why I think she’s great: Her dream man is the laid back surfer type. I can see that and think that shows good taste. Whenever I think of laid back surfer dudes I think of Brad Willis from Neighbours and Hayden Quinn from Masterchef Australia. If you don’t know the type Google them.
Reason why she wouldn’t think I was: Her ideal date would be something outdoorsy, like rock-climbing or scuba diving, well scuba diving is fair but rock-climbing…*runs away screaming* – have you not seen that advert where the cheap guy buys the rubbish rope because he likes a bargain?



Age: 23
Job: Speech Therapy Assistant
Location: Guisborough
Length of being single before Take Me Out: Six Months
Random Fact: Her worst first date is scuba diving as the open and deep water would freak her out and she doesn’t want to cry on a first date. I’m taking bets on what her date will be on the Isle of Fernando’s should she get there…
Reason why I think she’s great: Degree in linguistics. I’ve said it before folks, brains are sexy.
Reason why she wouldn’t think I was: Her ideal man would treat her like a Princess…I think many women want this and this might be a big fail in my love life endeavours. I need to learn how to treat people special.



Age: 26
Job: Sales & Marketing Executive
Location: London Town
Length of being single before Take Me Out: Eighteen Months
Random Fact: Her love of pink and lipstick has earned her the nickname ‘Barbie’
Reason why I think she’s great: Her ideal date would be quad biking (ok) or swimming with dolphins (Yes, Yes, Yes – I love dolphins!)
Reason why she wouldn’t think I was: She is turned off by bad teeth, bad skin and no sense of style. Well a few months back folks I had a date with someone who decided to write up a review of it for the world to see and here is what she wrote about my sense of style, ‘Mr M was in scruffy jeans, scruffy t-shirt and outrageous trainers. He did look like he had just rolled out of bed, chucked some clothes on and walked down the road.’ That is my style through the eyes of someone else. Would it shock you that a second date wasn’t pending…?



Age: 18
Job: Disney Princess
Location: Norfolk
Length of being single before Take Me Out: Two Months
Random Fact: She has four jobs, the aforementioned Disney Princess at Disneyland Paris, but also a gymnastics coach, a stilt walker and a dancer.
Reason why I think she’s great: She back-flipped a mile for charity. C’mon that is seriously amazing. Huge props.
Reason why she wouldn’t think I was: Her ideal date would involve an element of danger, well how about me cooking a meal? With my culinary skills that is serious danger. No? Oh.



Age: 23
Job: Customer Service Advisor
Location: Grimsby
Length of being single before Take Me Out: One Year
Random Fact: She cannot tell her left from her right.
Reason why I think she’s great: She has a photographic memory and that is a very handy skill to have, although she uses it to remember any outfit that someone has worn before. With me you wouldn’t need a photographic memory for that, as explained a couple of profiles ago, my sense of style is shall we say, pretty basic to say the least.
Reason why she wouldn’t think I was: Her ideal man would be good with their hands, have brown eyes and a Welsh accent. Well my tickling prowess has been commented on before but otherwise my hands are just hands, my eyes are blue and I speak with a broad southern accent.



Age: 30
Job: Site Secretary for a Constriction Company
Location: Kent
Length of being single before Take Me Out: Two Years
Random Fact: She has failed her driving test four times and has taken over 200 lessons.
Reason why I think she’s great: In her spare time she also works in Ann Summers. Need I say any more…?
Reason why she wouldn’t think I was: I have no idea who her ideal date of Joe Manganiello is. Like no idea.



Age: 23
Job: Personal Assistant
Location: London Town
Length of being single before Take Me Out: Two Years
Random Fact: She has a (very) irrational fear of oblong and square plates and would prefer to not eat dinner than eat off of one and people say I’m weird…
Reason why I think she’s great: She is an aspiring film maker and makes short films in her spare time. I mean just how cool is that? Always get big thumbs up from me for creative people.
Reason why she wouldn’t think I was: She wants a guy who is tall, tattooed and bearded. Well I did grow a beard not that long ago and I can assure you people of the internet, it was not a good look. Oh and I’m neither tall nor bearded. Woe.



Age: 23
Job: Ballet Teacher
Location: Dundee
Length of being single before Take Me Out: One Year
Random Fact: She used to be a cheerleader at Upton Park for West Ham.
Reason why I think she’s great: In her final year of uni she lived in a convent and the nuns would catch her and her friends sneaking out on CCTV. Those pesky nuns. I just like the idea of having to sneak past nuns.
Reason why she wouldn’t think I was: Nothing obvious in her notes that have been sent out but she is very spontaneous and that is something I most certainly am not and whenever I am, it backfires spectacularly.



Age: 35
Job: Oil Company Account Manager
Location: Cheshire
Length of being single before Take Me Out: One Year
Random Fact: Once Kelly’s friends dared her to kiss an old man in the pub so she did and his false teeth fell out in her mouth, that sounds proper grim although I bet she made that old guys evening! Why aren’t women ever dared to kiss me…
Reason why I think she’s great: Her ideal date is mud wrestling. Yep totally down with that. I mean totally (although I’d prefer jelly but still..)
Reason why she wouldn’t think I was: In the notes sent out just like Kayleigh above, nothing stands out for this section. I will note here that she eats a pea sandwich every day, quirky doesn’t cover it but I like it.



Age: 20
Job: Education Studies Student
Location: North Wales
Length of being single before Take Me Out: One Year
Random Fact: Her nickname is (unsurprisingly) Lil Kim based on the fact that she is 4ft11″
Reason why I think she’s great: Her celebrity crush is Dougie from McFly. I think that is a pretty good and normal crush. Some would say my crush on former PSU star volleyball middle hitter Katie Slay is a bit left field but Dougie from McFly in the context of this is pretty out there but I do like it.
Reason why she wouldn’t think I was: Her ideal man has a life plan. I had a life plan but then life got in the way and everything changed. Doh.



Age: 26
Job: Admin Assistant
Location: Belfast
Length of being single before Take Me Out: Three Years
Random Fact: She is afraid of many things (and not just actually meeting me, I often wonder what would happen if one of the girls ever bumped into me in the real world just how they would react, I mean I sit here in my mother’s basement – well that bit isn’t true, I actually live on my own with more bathrooms than people – but writing this does make me sound like a bit of a sad loser, which I am, but still, gotta keep up the appearance) but yeah, would they go, ‘oh my word, your blog is just so freaky you big freaky weirdo’ or would they say ‘your light-hearted whimsy tale of thirty women you’ve never met for a TV show was rather amusing and I of course don’t think of you as some freaky weirdo’ – I wonder if we’ll ever know? (deep down I suspect not and I fear the answer…) Anyway I have digressed quite spectacularly. She is afraid of the dark, the sea and any creature that is flying towards her.
Reason why I think she’s great: I love her logic of wanting an electrician because of her dislike of the dark, she thinks an electrician would be handy in a power cut. Logic people. Logic.
Reason why she wouldn’t think I was: Her celebrity crush is Tom Hardy due to his muscles, tattoos, lips and swagger. Well I technically have muscles (like we all do) and have lips (again like we all do) but I think I know what she means and alas 0% for me.


Kirsty S

Age: 26
Job: Horse Trainer
Location: Cheshire
Length of being single before Take Me Out: One Year
Random Fact: She owns twelve horses and two Dalmatians. Yes I did have to double check that to ensure I got that the right way around.
Reason why I think she’s great: Her ideal date could involve a banana boat. I would certainly do that.
Reason why she wouldn’t think I was: Her ideal man is strong-willed (yes), honest (yes) and confident (feck). Why oh why oh why do women not like awkward shy weirdos? I mean look at all we offer, awkwardness, shyness, acting weird, I mean who wouldn’t look for those characteristics in a potential beau? Oh I see, everyone. Dagnamnit.



Age: 19
Job: Sports Science Student
Location: Cardiff
Length of being single before Take Me Out: Never had a serious relationship (Oh Lauren, preaching to the choir, preaching to the choir…)
Random Fact: She is a very keen roller-blader but admits that she isn’t very good as yet.
Reason why I think she’s great: Her ideal date is something competitive because she likes the idea of a bit of rivalry and most importantly, she wants to win. Yes. This. I’ll tell you a story folks. Many moons ago I fancied this girl in the year below at uni. I once played her at Pool in the SU and all my mates told me I had to lose to let her win, that isn’t my style folks, that is so not my style. Instead I potted an extremely tricky black and won. That date wasn’t forthcoming although weirdly I did end up in her kitchen in the early hours of one morning talking abstract Journalism theories. That was abnormal.
Reason why she wouldn’t think I was: She is a chubby chaser, which sounds great as I have a bit of a belly on me (although less so than a year ago, lost two stone boys and girls, yes, props) but I don’t have the big curly hair nor the strong body frame that she desires. Sad times.



Age: 26
Job: Fire Breather and Circus Entertainer
Location: Leeds
Length of being single before Take Me Out: Eleven Months
Random Fact: She cannot break the three date barrier, she never hears from guys after the third date. I kinda know what she’s going through. I can’t break the one date barrier. That is more or less the same, No…?
Reason why I think she’s great: Circus performer, fire breather, body burning, hand candle dancing, poi spinning, fire hooping, static trapeze, hoop, silks, rope…I mean come people, who couldn’t fall head over heels for this person? As an aside, every year I mentally try and guess who’ll get the most Google searches from the show and Looci is the red hot favourite at this juncture, red hot favourite.
Reason why she wouldn’t think I was: She is turned off by men who wear smart leather shoes still live at home and have facial hair, but wait, what is that? I wear trainers, I live alone and am clean shaven/stubble depending on how lazy I’m being. Her worst idea for a date would be being serenaded over a candlelit dinner. I once had a first date that was a dinner date and I’ll tell you this folks, never again. Nothing in her notes says that I would send her running for the hills so let me dream people, let me dream…



Age: 27
Job: Nurse
Location: Norfolk
Length of being single before Take Me Out: Two and a half Years
Random Fact: She is afraid of the sea because she can’t swim. I love the sea and can’t swim. Heck I once went swimming in the sea even though I can’t swim. That was an erm…’interesting’ experience.
Reason why I think she’s great: She does animal impressions and her favourite is the dolphin. I freaking love dolphins!
Reason why she wouldn’t think I was: Her ideal man would be fun and silly, family orientated and has to have ambition and drive. Well I’m dour, deadly serious, a loner, how am I selling myself here? Apparently not very well. I love the word dour, it doesn’t really fit me but in this context I’m going to stick with it for comedic effect.



Age: 28
Job: Department Store Worker
Location: Wokingham
Length of being single before Take Me Out: One Year
Random Fact: Her celebrity crush is Gregg Wallace. If she wants a crush on a Masterchef judge she needs to Google George Calombaris. Now he is a man we could all have a crush on!
Reason why I think she’s great: She has a law degree people. As I’ve said before, brains = sexy.
Reason why she wouldn’t think I was: She is turned off by a guy who doesn’t like to go out. I was once nicknamed ‘hermit crab’ by someone, yeah I’m guessing I’ve turned her off already.



Age: 25
Job: Tennis Coach
Location: Essex
Length of being single before Take Me Out: One Year
Random Fact: Her brother is James Argent from TOWIE. I have no idea who that is, that says a lot about me I suspect.
Reason why I think she’s great: She loves the smell of new tennis balls and that is not a double entendre nor a euphemism. The smell of new tennis balls are genuinely pretty darn awesome.
Reason why she wouldn’t think I was: Her ideal man would be down to earth, kind-hearted, good looking and sporty. Well I’m sporty… (and I’d like to think kind-hearted but that is for others to decide)



Age: 24
Job: Mobile Hairdresser
Location: Sheffield
Length of being single before Take Me Out: One Year
Random Fact: Her mum is so desperate to marry her off that she keeps giving out Risha’s phone number to guys.
Reason why I think she’s great: She talks, shouts and swears a lot in her sleep. Just how entertaining would that be? (Well until you were really trying to sleep but still..)
Reason why she wouldn’t think I was: Her ideal date starts with dinner, No, No, No, No, No. I’ve had one dinner date and never ever again (well probably never, I won’t close the door to it but it was bad). However her ideal date does end in a jacuzzi, that I am fully on board with.



Age: 31
Job: Fashion Designer
Location: London Town
Length of being single before Take Me Out: Eighteen Months
Random Fact: She has partied with Pharrell Williams, Kelis, Timberland, Justin Timberlake and Evander Holyfield. Haven’t we all…? I once saw Sir Trevor Brooking on an escalator and saw Steve Claridge on the tube, how does that compare?
Reason why I think she’s great: She has her own fashion label called Mz Fits and that is pretty darn cool is it not? I know of the fashion label Mizfitz but that is a completely different type of clothing and probably not something I should know about. Ho hum…
Reason why she wouldn’t think I was: Her ideal man would be over 6ft and preferably be a plumber, electrician or personal trainer. I once fixed a boiler but apart from that I’ve got nothing.



The initial Press Pack had some inaccurate information for Sophie so the following has been amended.

Age: 24
Job: Marketing Assistant
Location: Surrey
Length of being single before Take Me Out: Two Years
Random Fact: Sophie lives in fear of being shat on by birds. It is a fine fear to have but I wouldn’t worry, it has happened to me twice, both bizarrely when on school grounds, maybe the birds were trying to tell me something (either that or seagulls hang around schools because lots of crumbs and discarded food to be had, either/or)
Reason why I think she’s great: Her pride and joy is her Border Collie Bella and any man who comes into her life would need to understand this. Well I’m a cat guy first and foremost but anyone who has real love for their pets gets the big thumbs up from me!
Reason why she wouldn’t think I was: Her biggest turn-off would be for a guy to turn up driving a bad car, notably a yellow Cinquinto. How would she feel about a guy driving an imaginary car…? Mentally I’m picturing a Fred Flintstone type vehicle at this point.



Age: 25
Job: Lampshade Designer
Location: London Town
Length of being single before Take Me Out: Four Years
Random Fact: Vanessa hates the gym but to keep her model physique in shape she loves to skip.
Reason why I think she’s great: Her guilty pleasure is Top Gear. That is cool. Certainly the cheap car challenges and the specials.
Reason why she wouldn’t think I was: Vanessa is turned off by men who have bad teeth or who are too into themselves to pay her any attention. To once again quote from that date that I had a few months ago that a young lady reviewed publicly, ‘So we walked along the beach to the pub, spent a couple of hours there and walked back. In this whole time, I think I talked about myself for all of 5 minutes, with not many questions or interest aimed at me. True, when you are nervous, you can talk too much. But if you are getting to know someone, surely you want to hear what they have to say?’ – So maybe, just maybe I am too into myself (which I think is bollocks but still, this lady thought so) oh and my teeth, not perfect, not bad but certainly not perfect.

All photos are copyright Fremantle Media and are courtesy of ITV.

Take Me Out starts on Saturday 3 January on ITV1 at 8:30 PM.

I hope you enjoyed this blog post. Please leave any comments or contact me directly via the E-Mail Me link on the Right Hand Nav. You can stay in touch with the blog following me on Twitter or by liking the blog on Facebook. Please share this content via the Social Media links below if you think anyone else would enjoy reading.

  • Share on Tumblr

Written by neilmonnery

December 30th, 2014 at 4:24 am

Posted in Media,Random Stuff

Tagged with ,

On the ending of The Newsroom…

without comments

Oh man. A show with so much promise, some first rate actors, some interesting characters and a star writer, how on Earth could it end so limply? I loved the first season, I enjoyed the second season in the main and even season three started off well but the final three episodes just sucked.

Let me start at the killing of Charlie Skinner at the end of episode five of this season, why Sorkin, why? I know you’ve explained why but once more I ask, why Sorkin, why? The Newsroom revolved around Skinner and the acting masterclass that Sam Waterston put on. I loved him in Law & Order and loved him just as much as the bourbon drinking head honcho at ACN. He didn’t need to die and the way he killed him was just so mundane and didn’t give him the gravitas that he deserved if he was to meet his demise.

So the final episode explored some of the back stories that put the cast together, we’ve seen this before from Sorkin. At the start of season two of The West Wing we saw a wonderful two-parter (In the Shadow of Two Gunmen) that showed how everyone came together. This time though it didn’t set up a season, it ended a shows run and it didn’t actually add too much to the storyline. We knew Sloane was into Don before (‘You never asked me’) and we knew Mac was dealing with issues from Afghanistan. We find out that Jim has had a bad long-distance (45 mins away by car) relationship before (thus setting up the Jim/Maggie ending) and we find out that Charlie is a true gent who wants to do the news right (er…we knew this already) and that Will cares about ratings and what people thought about him (again we knew that already) so is all seriousness for all the flashbacks we learnt that Jim has had a bad history in semi long-distance relationships. So worth it.

This brings me on to the most disgraceful part of the episode, the return of Neal (seriously dude, spell your name right, like all good Neil’s). Neal missed most of the season hiding out in Venezuela after refusing to give up a source ad what does he get after his near two months on the run? It gets announced at Charlie’s wake that his plane has landed and he gets a cool shot at the ACN Digital guys but he gets zero interaction with the rest of the crew. No pats on the back, no-one asking him how he was, nothing. Now I’m guessing this has to do with actor Dev Patel working on other projects so they just tried to shoehorn him into the episode but come on, film at least one scene where people welcome him back for fucks sake. As much as the fact he spells his name with an a instead of an i pisses me off, I loved Neal nearly as much as I loved Charlie. He reminded me of me, if only I was better looking, had better morals, was smarter…well he doesn’t remind me of me as such but his name is similar and I liked him, ok?

Mac is pregnant. Who cares? Mac gets promoted to be President of ACN without even being asked, like, for reals? Any scene with Leona is great as Jane Fonda is great. Seriously someone create a spin-off show that is just Leona and Charlie (assuming he can be resurrected from the dead) drink bourbon and bitch about the world and I’d be all over that. As would everyone who watched The Newsroom.

So we get to the finale of the most painful romance in TV history, Jim and Maggie. Jim (with whom I actually do identify in many ways despite not even being remotely close to my name) realised that he was in love with Maggie still, despite going out with Hallie (who was wonderful, if you were to possibly draw up my ‘ideal’ woman in terms of the type of person with whom I think I’d fall for then it would be Hallie, ambitious, smart, beautiful, quick-witted, sorry I’m just imagining the make-up sex with her after a fight, I’m sensing it would be amazing but I digress). So Jim and Hallie end after he is a dick (see, I told you I could relate to him) but in part it is because deep down he’s remembered his feelings for Maggie. She is seeing someone else too but he’s super smart and realises very quickly that she is hung up on Jim.

This tawdry love affair reaches a climax on a plane where they share an albeit beautiful kiss, the head stroke and smile on Maggie’s face seemed genuine and lovely. At times I can at least see romance even if I’m seemingly incapable of portraying it in real life. She finally had the one she wanted. Fast forward three days and after three nights of sex, Jim recommends her for a field producers position in DC, meaning they would have to be in a LDR (see the flashbacks did have a very small point after all) but having overcome the lazy blonde stereotype that she was in season one and after the abomination of what they did to her character in season two, she had blossomed into what we saw, a confident, smart, young woman. Hurrah. Yet here we are with her all nervous about Jim trying to ship her out of town. They end this mini-fight with her asking why he was so sure that this LDR would work when the others hadn’t and he walks away saying, ‘because I wasn’t in love with them’ – nice. A good line finally. Sadly we all know that in reality Jim would be too much of a prick for it to last and Maggie would find someone better suited in DC but we can all pretend, right? This wasn’t Josh and Donna from TWW, that love story needed no coercion, it was natural and the audience could see it and yearned for it, this was just meh.

To round this all off we of course get to Will and Mac. Mac is Will’s one. Will doesn’t care about ratings and doesn’t care about being liked deep down, that is all a mask, all he cares about is Mac and how she sees him. Mac and Will were together before but she cheated on him and he couldn’t forgive her at that point and went into years of depression that his one could do that to him. She is brought back by Charlie because he knows that the only way to turn both the show and Will around is to make him care once more and the only way to do that is to bring her in. Fair enough. It works as a storyline and we saw Will’s evolution into the character we all loved. Mac however never truly developed and her happiness came from being with Will and making him into the best person he could be. Sweet yes, but again shows how Sorkin struggles with writing female characters.

Look, don’t get me wrong, overall I enjoyed the show and Charlie and Leona were insanely good characters. Will was developed well and all three actors (Waterston, Fonda, Daniels) were first rate. Sadly though for an ensemble cast, the rest of the characters were never truly developed and this held back the show from becoming what it could have been, the acting was great but the writing concentrated too much on the holier-than-thou attitude of Sorkin towards the media (which may or may not be unfair depending on your take of the current media output that we are subjected to) but that air of arrogance held back the development of the other characters and forced relationships that didn’t sit well with the audience. It could’ve been special and when they were given six more episodes to end things then everything was set up for an epic climax, instead we got an average episode then summed up the missed chance once more that this show was.

The Newsroom 2012-2014. Loved, then liked, then watched. Sadly it won’t be terribly missed.

I hope you enjoyed this blog post. Please leave any comments or contact me directly via the E-Mail Me link on the Right Hand Nav. You can stay in touch with the blog following me on Twitter or by liking the blog on Facebook. Please share this content via the Social Media links below if you think anyone else would enjoy reading.

  • Share on Tumblr

Written by neilmonnery

December 15th, 2014 at 3:11 pm

Posted in Random Stuff

Tagged with

On my top ten Masterchef Australia contestants…

without comments

So season six is in the can for the UK audience after Brent lifted the trophy last Friday night. It was a welcome return for the show after a rather disappointing season five, where the producers casted based on personality over food and that led to a bunch of being average chefs getting on to the show.

So for fun (and for maybe the two people I know who watch MCA) – here is my list of my top ten favourite contestants, this isn’t to say the ten best contestants, but my personal ten favourites chefs based both on personality and cooking ability.

10) Andy Allen – Winner of season four. He was an average contestant, who could easily have gone early doors in week five when he and Sam were in the bottom two but the judges decided to send home neither in the elimination challenge in Tasmania. Was part of the Ben/Andy Bromance and his cooking about three to four weeks from the end really kicked on and in the final two weeks he won near enough every challenge. Nice guy and I was happy to see him win.

9) Hayden Quinn – Sixth in season three. Hayden was without a doubt one of the most popular contestants of all time on the show. The lifeguard from NSW was one of the first six through to the top 24 and he won the first challenge and backed that up with an immunity pin victory. Eminently likeable with a natural flair for cooking, he was always going to do well and fell just before finals week. Unsurprisingly was brought back for MCA All-Stars.

8) Brent Owens – Winner of season six. Brent, a bit like Andy was a journey contestant whose progression was clear to see as the competition went on. It looked unlikely he’d win at any point but as we whittled it down it was clear he had a chance. Arguably only Emelia was a better cook than him in this season but Brent was pretty sensational at Service Challenges and rarely got flustered. Another flat out likeable guy. Seems to be a pattern emerging but…

7) Claire Winton Burn – Third place in season two. Cold. If you were to describe her in one word, that would have been it. However she could really cook and seemed to take criticism well and learned from it. We have seen several ‘cold’ candidates in the show, Julia from S4, Emelia from S6, but I learned to root for all three as the show went on but Claire I liked from a long way out. I thought she was a fantastic cook who dished up some wonderful dishes.

6) Beau Cook – Eighth place in season four. When I was sorting out my list he wasn’t in it and then I sat here (or actually lay there, I was mentally doing this in bed last night) and I realised that there had not been a more fun contestant in the six years of the show. His dry wit was fantastic to see, although the way both he and Ben tried to throw themselves on the fire for Emma did bug me.

5) Peter Vickery – Ninth in season three. In the first episode of top 50, the judges gave dishes of the day to Kate, Michael, Alana and Peter. Even in the first episode, they may have found the four best cooks in the competition. Sadly for Peter his lack of self-confidence held him back at times and in his final elimination he was up against Kate tasked with making an apple pie. He had no chance although he did run her close. Great guy who I rooted for hard and when he was him v Kate I was so torn as they were my two favourites from that season.

4) Kylie Millar – Sixth in season four. Who couldn’t love Kylie? She was just flat out loveable and in the task when they were asked to cook with love and passion and it came out that she’d yet to be in a relationship, so hadn’t felt these emotions my heart broke just that little bit, I mean what on earth were the young men of NSW doing? Her pudding in the Masterchef magazine challenge was one of the most pornographic cakes that I have ever seen. She was just fantastic.

3) Marion Grasby – Ninth in season two. The biggest shock in MCA history. Marion quite simply was the best amateur chef ever to walk into the MCA kitchen. Not only was she a fantastic cook but also a great person, fun, always smiling. Like Hayden she was brought back for All-Stars like the top two in this list were. She also formed quite the double act with one other contestant who is still to appear on this list.

2) Kate Bracks – Winner of season three. I called Kate to win from the first episode. It may have had something to do with the fact she was attractive and ginger but also she served up a flatbread kofta that the judges raved about. In the first challenge in the top 24 she made a coffee cake that the judges were stunned by and she was terrific all the way through. Liked Kate a lot and she is still the only person I’ve tipped to win from top 24 who has done so.

1) Jonathan Daddia – Eighth place in season two. Quite simply…The Eliminator. The producers seemed to play up to Jonno as the bad boy of the bunch but he was very much hit or miss, he was great or he was terrible but most of all he was entertaining to watch. Eight times he survived elimination and it showed that when he was on, he could flat out cook. He and Marion were a fine double act, certainly in All Stars and there is on doubt whatsoever that Marion saying, ‘Jonno’ is etched on my memory.

I know no-one from S1 or S5 made this list, the reason is that Chris and Justine were in the mix but I wasn’t a huge fan of season one. Season five was just shocking and only Lynton and Rishi deserved really to even be thought about. Others who were in my thoughts for this list included from S2 Callum, from S3, Kumar, Ellie, Arena, Alana, from S4, Ben, Alice, Tregan and from S6, Emelia, Sarah and Kira.

I hope you enjoyed this blog post. Please leave any comments or contact me directly via the E-Mail Me link on the Right Hand Nav. You can stay in touch with the blog following me on Twitter or by liking the blog on Facebook. Please share this content via the Social Media links below if you think anyone else would enjoy reading.

  • Share on Tumblr

Written by neilmonnery

November 26th, 2014 at 4:15 pm

Posted in Media

Tagged with

Sky Sports NFL Coverage 2014 – Once more stepping it up

with 2 comments

The NFL season got underway the other night and tonight we are back with our usual Sunday night doubleheader. On Thursday Sky Sports showed us some of their plans for the 2014 season, the 20th that they have been coverage the league and I must say I’m quietly impressed with what they are doing. Here is an overview.

Firstly they are making their analysts more permanent. In recent years it has been Nick Halling and latterly Neil Reynolds being joined by a seemingly random cast of others. This year it will be Shaun Gayle joining the team until Thanksgiving whereupon he’ll be aside for Jeff Reinebold to take us the rest of the way.

Personally I like this set up as it gives the team more of a chance to gel and I wasn’t overly keen on the show being used as a tryout for former NFL players who wanted to get involved in broadcasting, Rocky Boiman (who sounds like Lisa’s character in The Simpsons when she was pretending to be a boy to do Maths at the boys half of Springfield Elementary) aside, I have not been impressed by any of these people and any set up that gives us more Jeff Reinebold is one that I can fully endorse. I think Jeff is by far and away the best analyst we’ve had on Sky Sports NFL coverage in the decade plus that I have been watching. He has a relaxed style but also has the technical nous to take us through the x’s and o’s so I’m happy.

Of course then there is big Cecil Martin. I know many of the more knowledgeable fans get annoyed by his antics but I like it. He’ll be around for the Wembley games this year so he is still involved. A Gayle-Reinebold-Martin monopoly in the analysts chair is a ok by me. I don’t know if they’ll be extra guest analysts but between those three they have a good solid team.

Neil Reynolds received a tonne of stick when I wrote the blog post about Nick Halling leaving the NFL team for the Boxing gig three years ago. The comments do not read well for Neil but my namesake isn’t half as bad as some of those comments say. Reynolds is a more than solid guy and if we all put up with Kevin Cadle’s presenting style then we can put up with Neil Reynolds.

The Red Zone is back on Sunday’s and they’ll show more highlights on the main channel as well as live look ins. For the Thursday night game, Sky will also show the CBS pre-game show, which will be something different. Like other Sky shows, they’ve also been given a ‘SkyPad’ aka a rather large touchscreen where Reynolds and the analyst can go through tactics and the like. Again Sky showing some decent investment in the NFL.

I don’t think the NFL brings too many subscriptions to the company but I do think it is a relatively inexpensive and popular filler for Sky. If the NFL does expand to London in terms of a full-time franchise based in the capital then it will be a very significant sport for TV companies over here. I think Sky do a very good job in terms of most sports and I think they treat NFL with more seriousness the more they cover the sport.

When you throw in what Channel 4 do with the Sunday Night Game then fans of the NFL in this country get a pretty good deal. Eurosport will show the Monday Night game against this year and that is a strange one for me but heck, it is live on TV. I think if my memory serves me right this is the last year of Sky’s three-year deal they signed in 2012 and that means the rights will be up over the summer and I have zero doubt BT Sport will make a play for them. As I said earlier, it isn’t a sport that brings in a tonne of subs but it will be a very nice addition to BT’s portfolio should they steal it and I suspect a key thing to keep for Sky Sports.

Personally I hope Sky’s long partnership with the NFL continues beyond this season but I think it is very much up for grabs. Sky are showing commitment to the sport with their coverage and I expect another good year this year both on the field of play and in the TV studio.

Lastly you can tweet the team here:

Kevin Cadle – @kevincadle
Neil Reynolds – – @neilreynoldsnfl
Shaun Gayle – @85worldchamps
Cecil Martin – @cecilmartin1
Jeff Reinebold – @jeff_reinebold
Sky Sports NFL Account – @skysportsnfl

I hope you enjoyed this blog post. Please leave any comments or contact me directly via the E-Mail Me link on the Right Hand Nav. You can stay in touch with the blog following me on Twitter or by liking the blog on Facebook. Please share this content via the Social Media links below if you think anyone else would enjoy reading.

  • Share on Tumblr

Written by neilmonnery

September 7th, 2014 at 2:11 pm

Posted in American Sport,Media

Tagged with ,

Andrew Strauss calls Kevin Pietersen a c*** on live TV but keeps his job – what bull

with 3 comments

Oh an open microphone. Broadcasting is a strange beast. I have dabbled as many will know and whilst many may have sympathy for Andrew Strauss following events yesterday. I do not. For the record I am no big fan of Strauss but nor am I a big fan of KP. I don’t really have a horse in this race.

For those who don’t know what happened then here is the article from the Independent – Andrew Strauss ‘mortified’ and ‘profusely sorry’ after he calls Kevin Pietersen a ‘c**t’ live on air. The former England captain thought he was off air (Sky were on an ad break) but in fact they were still live in other parts of the world and decided it was a good time to call Kevin Pietersen the c-word whilst his microphone was on.

Sky quickly made an apology, tweeting the following, Earlier comments were made during a break of play which were heard overseas. We apologise for the language used and Strauss followed suit by stating I apologise unreservedly, particularly to Kevin Pietersen. I am mortified and profusely sorry.

Sources seem to suggest that this will be the end of the matter but that just rings hollow to me. I have been a staunch admirer of Sky’s cricket coverage for many many years. I genuinely think their team is the best in the sport and might well be the best in any sport I watch. They hired Andrew Strauss specifically because they wanted him, fresh out of the sport after his issues with Kevin Pietersen, to essentially give a good insight into the inner workings of the England dressing room. Sadly for them, all he’s done is not comment or criticise because he’s still mates with except everyone bar Kevin Pietersen, who he’s been happy to tear apart, this is unprofessional and poor broadcasting but it is still not an open personal attack, which now he has done.

If Sky really believed in their brand and product then they would fire him on the spot. In all fairness the fact they extended his original contract (which covered the two Ashes series last year according to reports at the time) seems highly questionable. His broadcasting talents are well below the standards of his fellow top tier of Sky cricket commentators. Strauss can’t hold a candle to the likes of Atherton, Holding, Bumble, Hussain, Warne, Gower and yes even Botham and his constant grumpiness that he’s watching cricket and not fishing. Strauss adds nothing to the team but yet he seems to be being molded for big things by the corporation.

He should be gone and even if they chose not to fire him, he should be taken out of the spotlight of their Test team sooner rather than later. The first test against India starts on Wednesday and if Strauss is involved then we’ll know what Sky think is more important, keeping Strauss happy or allowing personal vitriolic attacks on people. Andrew Strauss is perfectly entitled to his opinion on KP but he is not sitting around watching the game on his sofa with his mates, he’s being paid a good amount of money by a big company to professional broadcast.

If Sky won’t remove Strauss from the firing line then he should do it himself. Ask to be stepped down or offer his resignation. I doubt he’ll do either but Andrew Strauss has never come across as a man high on principles anyway. Many many people have been involved in many many broadcasts and knowing what you can and can’t say isn’t exactly rocket science. If there is a chance your microphone is on then it is best not to say anything that can get you into trouble. Strauss fell foul of this and because of what he said and who he said it about (given their history) then his position would seem to me to be untenable but Sky have a history of backing their people beyond where they should so come Wednesday I fully expect to see the previous England captain on my screen and it will push me further towards TMS even though I’d be loathed to not listen to Michael Atherton or Michael Holding, who are supreme.

I hope you enjoyed this blog post. Please leave any comments or contact me directly via the E-Mail Me link on the Right Hand Nav. You can stay in touch with the blog following me on Twitter or by liking the blog on Facebook. Please share this content via the Social Media links below if you think anyone else would enjoy reading.

  • Share on Tumblr

Written by neilmonnery

July 6th, 2014 at 9:30 am

Posted in Other Sport

Tagged with ,

World Cup – The TV Battle – BBC v ITV

with one comment

So far I have seen every minute of the World Cup bar a snooze during the first half of the Iran v Nigeria game yesterday. I also have read a lot of feedback on the presenters, pundits, commentators and co-commentators (otherwise known as summerisers to certain people who like a disparage me) so I thought I’d put my views forward for the seven people that might read this:


The BBC use a former Golden Boot winner, darling of English football, Walkers Crisps seller and all around Mr. Nice Guy. ITV use an overexcited 47 year-old Brummie. It really should be a slam dunk for the Beeb shouldn’t it? Well it isn’t. Gary has improved a lot since his shuttering start eons ago when he replaced Des Lynam as the host of BBC’s Football output.

There is nothing wrong with Gary but there is also a lot to say positively for Adrian (and indeed Matt Smith). Adrian’s style is certainly less relaxed than Gary’s but he certainly injects more of his personality. When they presented the pre-game show from the beach on Sunday afternoon, you saw Adrian in his absolute element and it was a thoroughly enjoyable pre-game.

Both the Beeb and ITV have more than competent front men. I have a feeling Adrian gets a lot of stick because a lot of people think that they can do better than him. Hosting live TV is not easy and I think he does an admirable job.


We’ll start with the cream of the crop – Thierry Henry and Lee Dixon. Henry has been the breath of fresh air that everyone expected him to be and shows why everyone is fighting over securing his services going forward. A Sky team of Neville, Carragher, Souness, Hoddle and Henry is pretty dreamy. Dixon is the class of the ITV field and we knew that going in once Roy Keane decided not to travel to Brazil.

Dixon anchors the ITV team and is the man who can put together some actual analysis and not just opinion. Something his fellow pundits seem to struggle with.

Away from the top pundits we have Rio Ferdinand who I’m just not warming to as a pundit, his defence of Wayne Rooney’s performance seemed to show that he is still too near to the team to be subjective. In what was a bizarro moment it was this exchange that shown Alan Shearer is not as awful as the popular opinion says. Shearer was adamant that Rooney has to get that effort on target in the second half and he wouldn’t let it go. Good for Alan.

Over on ITV we have Glenn Hoddle who has always been a more than solid pundit. I still don’t understand why he hasn’t gotten another crack at management – certainly at Spurs. Fabio Cannavaro seems to struggle speaking in English and Patrick Vieira is missing Roy Keane as they could have been a fiery pairing.

Of course there is also Ian Wright but he’s in the Robbie Savage mould of just being awful but keeps getting TV work. Robbie Savage had a stint at co-commentary last night and oy vey.


Guy Mowbray has been handed the gig as the top man at the Beeb again for this tournament but he is being dragged down by the choice of co-commentators he’s been stuck with. This is an issue across the BBC. Jonathan Pearce had an absolute stinker in the France game the other night getting all in a fluster regarding goal line technology. He needs to learn that silence is golden and a TV commentator doesn’t have to speak for every single second.

Over at ITV then Clive Tyldesley has been the top man since Brian Moore retired. There is nothing wrong with his commentary and he calls big moments well but I just yearn for Martin Tyler and/or Ian Darke who are both better but both commentating for non UK audiences once more this World Cup. ITV’s number two is the only one of these people that I have met during some work experience with 107.4 The Quay many moons ago – Sam Matterface. I still have very little idea how he rose from calling Portsmouth games on local radio to going to the World Cup as ITV’s #2 commentator but he has. He isn’t Jon Champion and he probably isn’t even Peter Drury but he isn’t horrific and is certainly better than Jonathan Pearce – although that isn’t saying much.


Phil Neville was given the chance to call England games after the auntie decided Mark Lawrenson was too dour for the top team. Then Phil Neville spoke and whilst what he said wasn’t actually that bad – the way he spoke was a real turn-off. The fact 445 people have complained to the BBC about him is a joke but it certainly wasn’t a great debut. Elsewhere the Beeb has Mark Lawrenson who is ok, Martin Known who certainly is not and the more than adequate Kevin Kilbane. They gave Robbie Savage a chance and er…yeah. I think the less said about that the better. Never again BBC. Never again.

ITV leads with Andy Townsend and whilst I think he gets a lot of very deserved stick, they might not have anyone better. They had Jim Beglin on staff for ages but got rid of him when he was in fact superior to Townsend and since then the likes of Clarke Carlisle have been given a chance to impress as they seem to really like the Matterface/Carlisle combination but I just don’t get it.

All in all I’d say the BBC probably has the better team and when it comes down to it I’ll watch the final on the Beeb I suspect. I think both channels can be comfortable with their studio outfit but when it comes to behind the microphone, the BBC has Jonathan Pearce who is a real turn-off but otherwise (bar Savage’s attempts) they are ok (I think Phil Neville will get better) but ITV just don’t have anyone bar Clive Tyldesley who I’d say was anything better than average.

I hope you enjoyed this blog post. Please leave any comments or contact me directly via the E-Mail Me link on the Right Hand Nav. You can stay in touch with the blog following me on Twitter or by liking the blog on Facebook. Please share this content via the Social Media links below if you think anyone else would enjoy reading.

  • Share on Tumblr

Written by neilmonnery

June 17th, 2014 at 3:20 pm

Posted in Football,Media

Tagged with ,

Sister Cristina Scuccia and her quite heartwarming TV moment

without comments

I haven’t blogged in an age. So what could drag me back into writing? Well how about the story of a nun, a TV show and general all round awesomeness?

If you know me well you’ll know that gutter TV and me are in a relationship. I watch a lot of rubbish television. A lot. Like a lot of people I also enjoy The Voice, well the audition part of The Voice anyway. The rest isn’t that great but the auditions are fun. I watch the UK version. I watch the American version and I also scour YouTube to watch auditions from versions from all over the Globe.

Well over the weekend one audition has gone viral. The audition of Sister Cristina Scuccia. The 25 year-old nun who lives in Milan but originally from Sicily was insecure about her life and where it was heading. Her Mother Superior told her to use her gift of a singing voice and audition for The Voice of Italy and if on the off chance you haven’t seen it yet then it is embedded below and is just quite frankly heartwarming.

Now is it the best audition I have seen in terms of singing voice? Probably not but it is extremely good. However what makes it stand out is watching the audience go crazy and then the faces of all the judges as they turned around. If there is one thing the Italian public will like it is a nun who can entertain. She must be about as red hot favourite as their has ever been for one of these shows after just one audition. A deeply Catholic country, a nun, real singing talent, that is a recipe for insane popularity right there.

The crowd go nuts after her first line and the two males judges look at each other noticing this and knowing it must be something special. The rapper J-Ax is the one that goes first followed by former X Factor Italy star Noemi. They are both delighted with what they see and J-ax implores the other two to push their buttons. Piero Pelu does so and then after more pleading Raffaella Carrà finally turns her button but gestures clearly that she’s only done it on the say so of J-ax before turning around and her jaw hitting the ground.

Nuns from her religious order are watching and are overjoyed as everyone turns and then the judges make their cases to Sister Cristina. J-ax says that if he had heard her voice whilst in his teens then he’d probably be Pope by now and that they could be the devil and the holy water. The other male judge Piero Pelu also makes an impassioned plea for her to join his team. Raffaella Carrà is just stunned that this is a real nun and Noemi decides to attempt to engage with her religious side by proclaiming herself holy water as well.

At the end she says that she had decided beforehand that if she had to choose then she would do so solely on the basis of who turned first and therefore chooses J-ax. Sometimes opposites attract and I have a feeling these two will win the competition and she will go on to be a big star and potentially a huge asset to the Roman Catholic church as they look to engage with a younger generation. I think she chose J-ax correctly as he was clearly the most into her voice, his reactions say as much.

This audition has gone viral due to the fact it is such a feel good story. Her voice is clearly legit and isn’t TV there to get us talking and to entertain us? In this case it has certainly done that to me because I just can’t stop watching it. I will certainly be looking out for her future performances!

I hope you enjoyed this blog post. Please leave any comments or contact me directly via the E-Mail Me link on the Right Hand Nav. You can stay in touch with the blog following me on Twitter or by liking the blog on Facebook. Please share this content via the Social Media links below if you think anyone else would enjoy reading.

  • Share on Tumblr

Written by neilmonnery

March 23rd, 2014 at 7:41 pm

Posted in General

Tagged with

Andy Gray & Richard Keys singing ‘Get your tits out…’ to a female presenter (video).

without comments

Andy Gray and Richard Keys are ‘lads’ as some people would say. They are also clearly immature pathetic individuals. They got their comeuppance when there were leaks of videos of them talking about Sian Massay and then how Gray dealt with a female colleague. They disappeared from UK TV and are now presenting and commentating on Bein Sport in Dubai. They have disappeared from the public (or shall we say the football) consciousness for a good while now until last Saturday.

Last Saturday Andy Gray stepped into the commentary box alongside Ian Darke to call the Stevenage v Everton FA Cup game for BT Sport. Michael Owen was on holiday so Gray came in for a guest appearance. Now I know we’ve all come to realise how bad Michael Owen is in this role but having Andy Gray back alongside Ian Darke reminded us about what good co-commentary is. He was exceptional. Pairing him up with one of his two his long-time commentary partners in Ian Darke was a wise decision. It was like slipping on a very comfortable pair of jogging bottoms and slippers. The commentary was first rate. The sins of the past, whilst not forgotten, maybe forgiven. The general feedback was positive and doors were opened about Gray’s future and possible return to UK TV on a more permanent basis.

Step in another leak. This one comes from well over a decade ago and shows Andy Gray and Richard Keys singing ‘Get your tits out for the lads’ to Clare Tomlinson, who was at the time the main reporter for Sky Sports Football in the tunnel for the big games. You can watch the video below.

Now the timing of this leak is of course interesting. Just a few days after Andy Gray made a return to UK TV to overwhelming praise. This leak is clearly meant to derail any possibility of Andy Gray doing more work with BT. So the question is whether the leak is from the Sky hierarchy or whether it is a former colleague who was subjected to working with Gray during his time at Sky Sports. I’m relatively sure it is the latter.

The one thing though this video shows apart from how crass and vile these two men clearly are/were is that they were crass and vile for a long, long time. Sky obviously knew about it but they decided to ignore the problem. Either they chose to do so because they didn’t want to upset their talent or because they didn’t care. I suspect it is probably a bit from column A and a bit from column B.

Since Clare Tomlinson left her role as the touchline reporter for big games on Sky Sports, no women have played a key role in any of their major live sporting coverage as a presenter, commentator or reporter bar Georgie Thompson’s one year on Sky F1. Women have been involved in minor sports and in other roles but they’ve failed to break through in those big three roles. In all honesty Georgie might have been the right pick to front F1 instead of Simon Lazenby but they went for Lazenby. This is in vast contrast to the BBC where Gabby Logan, Hazel Irvine, Sue Barker and Clare Balding have all presented or still do present major live sporting events on the channel.

Sky clearly have a problem. I’m not saying they need to get rid of talent just to bring in women but they have to find better ways to bring through female talent in key roles. They clearly have talented women on staff with Sky Sports News. I am sure Hayley McQueen, Kirsty Gallacher, Sarah-Jane Mee and Natalie Sawyer to name a few could be excellent presenters on big live sporting events. I know they have had a little exposure in these roles but why don’t they get more?

I don’t want Jeff Stelling replaced in any capacity. I don’t want Ed Chamberlain replaced in any capacity. I don’t want David Gower replaced in any capacity. I don’t want Dave Clark replaced in any capacity. They are probably the four most well known front men sky have (Champions League, Soccer Saturday, Super Sunday, Monday Night Football, England Cricket, Darts, Boxing) but there are surely sports for these people to branch out from autocue readers on Sky Sports News. Dave Clark did, Simon Thomas did, Dave Jones did, so why haven’t any of the women?

I question the culture at Sky Sports and suspect it has been poor for many a year. This video shows someone knew (and I suspect everyone knew) how sexist and ugly the workplace was for women for many years. Nothing happened until videos started to get leaked. Had no-one leaked the Keys/Gray videos then I have no doubt they would both be at Sky. So I wonder what Sky Sports will do for women.

On the issue of Andy Gray then I’m completely torn. He is the best co-commentator on football we have. As much as I like Alan Smith, Jim Beglin and Gary Neville, Gray is the most natural in the business. BT have won Champions League rights from the 2015-2016 season and having Darke and Gray anchor their coverage would be a real good move. However the question of whether he is a changed man or not must play a factor. If he has then everyone deserves a second chance but if he hasn’t then the sexual objectivity he creates in the workplace is vastly more important than having a better pundit in the commentary box, even if it means putting up with the monotone and hapless Michael Owen for a few more years.

I hope you enjoyed this blog post. Please leave any comments or contact me directly via the E-Mail Me link on the Right Hand Nav. You can stay in touch with the blog following me on Twitter or by liking the blog on Facebook. Please share this content via the Social Media links below if you think anyone else would enjoy reading.

  • Share on Tumblr

Written by neilmonnery

January 31st, 2014 at 2:20 am

Posted in Football

Tagged with ,