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Hello. My name is Charles Sale and I hate Martin Brundle (and to a lesser degree David Coulthard)

Charles Sale is a funny man. His column in the Daily Mail is rarely worth readsing but every so often he delivers a gem that I’m pointed to on a forum somewhere. This happened this morning over on the F1 Thread at Digital Spy. Charles Sale is meant to be the man in the know about all things TV and sport related but half the times his ITK pieces turn out to be wider of the mark than David Beckham’s Euro 2004 Penalty miss v Portugal.

So what has old Charlie been saying this time…?

BRUNDLE AND JORDAN SQUABBLE OVER GRIDWALK

There are tensions in the BBC F1 team around the pre-race gridwalk which has been Martin Brundle’s domain and which he wants to continue, even it means a dash back to the TV booth at Silverstone to start his race commentary.

And the all-powerful Brundle has pulled rank at least once this season on his pundit colleague Eddie Jordan, who is keen to ask the questions on the grid himself.

Sensational news. Eddie Jordan wants to do more gridwalking because it is an important part of the coverage but Martin Brundle prefers to do it because you know – he’s been doing it for the best part of a decade and a half and he is critically acclaimed. Brundle is seriously fantastic on the gridwalk, asks the right questions and doesn’t waffle on. Without a doubt Brundle is the gridwalk king and as long as the commentary box box is near enough to the grid he should do it every single time.

End.

However the piece short sharp story might be even worse.

OPINION SPLIT OVER BBC COMMENTARY TEAM

The BBC say the response from F1 fans to the celebrity commentary partnership of Martin Brundle and David Coulthard this season has been hugely positive.

But former driver John Watson is among those who much prefer listening to the combination of David Croft and Anthony Davidson on 5 Live and Watson calls BBC ditching their former lead commentator Jonathan Legard as ‘frankly shameful’.

How. Just how does the story sync up with the title? Opinion is not split. One person says they don’t like it and that equals a split opinion? Also when are Martin Brundle and David Coulthard celebrities first and foremost? Both are former racing drivers and one has been in the commentary box for his 15th straight season. Was Murray Walker and Martin Brundle a ‘celebrity commentary partnership’? No they weren’t. Yet more bile from Sale who has long hated Brundle and blames him solely for the BBC dumping the much-maligned and not liked Jonathan Legard and tries to find every conceivable angle to lampoon Brundle from.

His full column can be read here but it’s mostly shite. If I ever became a national newspaper columnist (yeah like that is ever going to happen) I’d like to think that I wouldn’t let personal feelings and bias get in the way of facts. I know a man though who doesn’t conform to this ideal…

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